A Mom Made A Dress Out Of Donated Pubic Hair And We’ve Got Some Questions

Sarah Louise Bryan is a mother of two who pulled herself out of homelessness by creative a dress made of 3,000 Skittles. Impressive! But art is nothing without suffering, which ostensibly is the reason her current masterpiece consists of donated pubes.

The inspiration, surprisingly or not, I can’t decide, was Lady Gaga’s infamous meat dress. “I wanted to beat her at the title of most disgusting dress,” 28-year-old Bryan told The Mirror. “I set to work with my eye mask, breathing mask and thickest gloves I could find, because who wants to eat pubic hair?” said Bryan. Haha, nobody, ever, in the history of the world. “I thought of the design because of how gross it is. I thought what would be the worst thing to have on your dress.” Some things you just can’t argue.

Bryan spent six months collecting pubes via Twitter and stashing them in her poor 13-year-old son’s bedroom, who may or may not file for emancipation as soon as he turns 18.

Anyway, we’ve got some questions.

More Disturbing Humans: This Woman Quit Her Job To Breastfeed Her Boyfriend Every Two Hours

dress A Mom Made A Dress Out Of Donated Pubic Hair And We’ve Got Some Questions

-Why? Why?

-Also, can you fucking not?

-Ok, but seriously: Is it itchy?

If you get enough old dude pubes, could you make the world’s worst wedding dress?

-How does one go from the delightful medium of Skittles to that of pubes?

-I see you have carpets in your home. Are you maybe reconsidering that decision? I’m hoping you’ve invested in a high-powered vacuum cleaner.

-Were blonde people more hesitant to donate their, uh, carpets? How about redheads?

-Speaking of carpets, approximately how many shitty “carpet matching the drapes” jokes have you gotten?

-Did you include your own pubes?

-You say you pride yourself for creating something so unique. Can you fucking not?

-You say your next creation will be grosser. Can you elaborate?

-Can you fucking not?

In Case You’re Not Puking Yet: Don’t Watch This Pimple Popping Video If You Ever Want To Eat Ramen Again

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