A visit to Helga the hot waxer is never exactly fun, but it doesn’t have to keep you from sleeping or bring on an anxiety attack. V Waxing, otherwise known as yet another painstaking beautification process that men don’t have to deal with, can be a necessary evil. It will keep you confident in your bikini and help you to feel smooth and sexy in skimpy clothes or during a hot and heavy encounter with a gorgeous island man (yes, I was picturing How Stella Got Her Groove Back for some reason).
We want to make it very clear that going au naturale is more than OK, and can be extremely sexy as well. Choosing the right grooming for your chocha is a completely personal choice and whatever it is you decide should be because you, and only you, want to do it. Remember, guys are basically hair with bodies attached, so never feel bad about looking how nature made you!
For those of you who do want to get their downstairs hair groomed by a professional, read on for some helpful hints every woman should know beforehand.
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1. You’re gonna have to grow out that bush first
You cannot trim or shave for four weeks before your wax, as it will make it very difficult for the technician to get a fully hairless result. Even worse? It may result in having to go over the same areas over and over (recipe for a red, inflamed mess), or even whipping out the tweezers and going hair for hair on your ass (er. vagina).
2. Know what kind of wax to use
Most waxing spots use soft wax, as it is very spreadable and effective at removing a lot of hair at one time. It is applied with a wooden stick and taken off with a strip of fabric. With hard wax there is no removal strip, because it hardens and is pulled off along with your hair. The hard wax is typically more gentle because it sticks only to the hair and not the skin.
3. It IS possible to do it yourself
While it isn’t for the faint of heart, it is doable. Find out how here.
4. Exfoliate before
Using a sugar scrub the night before your wax will help remove ingrown hairs and prep skin for the wax.
5. Pick how hairless you want to be ahead of time
In case you are unsure of the terms for how to style your pubes, here you go: “Bikini line touchup” just means hair around the perimeter of your V will be removed. “Full bikini” means you will have a tight little triangle of hair as well as an overall trim. “French bikini” is the removal of all hair on the vagina, except for a landing strip, triangle, square (or any other cute little shape you can think of), but leaving any hair on the backside of you alone. “Brazilian” means everythingggg is gone, including inside your butt (!). Brazilians can also feature a small landing strip, Bermuda triangle (which sits above your labia), a rectangle or square. “Hollywood” is basically a Brazilian but with no hair left at all.
6. It’s going to hurt
There’s really no way to make it not hurt, but that doesn’t mean you should freak out. It’s totally normal to feel nervous, but remember that the pain is VERY shortlived, and only lasts for a few seconds. Make sure to show up in comfy, loose clothes so nothing is hugging the area when you’re all done.
7. Don’t drink booze beforehand
The first time you get waxed may prompt you to throw a few back, but it’s actually going to tighten the pores, which makes the hair more difficult to remove.
8. Take an ibuprofen
If you pop one or two (depending on your pain threshold) 30 minutes before you go, as it will help to reduce inflammation as well as pain.
9. If you have your period you might want to skip a wax
So technically it IS possible to get waxed while wearing a tampon, but it’s going to be a lot more painful. Ideally, you should avoid the five days before and after riding the crimson wave.
10. Don’t freak out when they ask you to spread
There are tiny hairs around your butt and inside your V. The technician very well may ask you to help her gain access to it by getting involved a bit. Use cleansing wipes before to make sure you look and feel fresh.
11. Take a day off from the gym and sex
Not a good idea to go from the wax appointment to Soulcycle, as it will irritate the shit out of you. Same goes for getting it on that night.
12. Expect a good 3 weeks of smoothness
You can head back for another wax after about four weeks, or when the hair is about 1/2 inch long. The more you get waxed, the longer you will stay smooth in between visits, due to the hair follicle becoming progressively more weak.