10 Women Get Honest About The Weird Ways They Got Pregnant

While getting pregnant is easy peasy for some, there is a healthy percentage of women who just need some time, patience, and extra nudging to move the process along (but hey, parenting in general is a mix of ease and utter frustration, so why should the process of getting there be any different?).

I’ve had a few “wow, I didn’t expect to get pregnant from” moments myself, and before you sit back and assume that all it takes is a casual tryst with someone of the opposite sex — you’re wrong. It’s timing, so very much of the act of making a brand new human boils down to the precise timing of getting high quality sperm to a very fragile egg with a short shelf life (gasp, 24 hours is a lot of pressure).

Here are a few of my favorite examples of above and beyond fertility efforts from a crowdsource status on my personal Facebook page, perhaps you can relate:

1. Going Paleo helped Kristen get to be a momma of 3 kids.

So, celery IS the answer?

kristen

2. If you flip upside down on amusement park rides when there’s already some sperm inside you, there’s a chance it’ll get a good zygote going and you’ll be called “Mom” sooner rather than later.

I mean, according to Lauren’s uterine experiences, anyway.

rollercoaster pregnancy

3. You can buy illegal meds from India.

This is probably the WORST idea of all time, but a friend of mine who declined to be quoted with her real name told me she’s now 8 months pregnant with triplets. Why? Not because she’s naturally an egg-dropping machine, but because she bought some cheap fertility meds from the Internet that came shipped from India. She asked for 25 mg of generic Clomid, but she’s pretty sure they screwed up and gave her 100 mg tablets. She’s lucky because it could’ve rendered her lady parts totally useless, but now she’s pregnant with THREE, scared to death but excited, and plucking out random chin hairs like crazy. Emphasis here is totally on illegal. Don’t be a criminal like my friend, okay?

4. IVF can be a real miracle for a lot of women.

If you’re not deeply familiar with IVF already, my friend Rachel is a top expert in the field of IVF and egg freezing and wrote extensively about her own experiences. Totally worth a read. She just documented her own frozen embryo transfer experiences, so it’s basically a miracle to hear that my friend Shira had her son Ben after ONE transferred embryo. Total miracles.

ivf

5. For some women, a trip to Botswana and a bunch of Malaria meds just may be the trick.

This girl is now a mom of 6, by the way. Can you wrap your head around that?

botswana

6. A bottle of Jameson and a relaxed attitude might just be the key to a good time.

Is Emily the best, or what?

jameson

7. Getting needles stuck in you could be the way to make a baby, and lots of women swear by it.

An unnamed friend of mine reported to me: “We were trying for over 7 months and honestly just couldn’t afford the pricy fertility clinics and I was afraid to try anything too unnatural, so I opted for a Chinese medicine clinic that was partially covered by my insurance. Twice a week I headed for fertility-focused acupuncture, and my co-pay was about the price of a solid meal at Chipotle so it wasn’t too bad. By the end of 12 weeks of acupuncture I remember distinctly being upset that my period disappeared. I even thought I must really messed up, fertility wise, because where could a period go? It was gone because there was a small creature who we later named Jackson living inside me.”

8. Spiritual baths are said to be good luck.

Observant Jewish women are no stranger to a special, solo spiritual bath called a “mikveh” each month. Dipping in the mikveh (usually at or near a synagogue and generally reserved for women in a posh, private setting) is said to help all things womanly, including fertility. One fan of the popular Jewish website JewintheCity.com reported that’s how she ended up a mom:

mikveh

9. And then there’s always just getting clinical and SERIOUS about your sex.

It worked for Jessica and her husband, anyway, because they just dropped their pants daily, no questions asked.

daily sex

10. Or you can just use mayonnaise.

“A mixture of egg yolk and soya oil — which is believed to restrain a mother’s so-called Natural Killer (or NK) cells, and therefore make her more likely to sustain a full-term pregnancy,” says The Daily Mail. I have an unhealthy obsession with mayo, and a bunch of kids? Coincidence? Starting to think not.

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