11 Guys Dish Their Intense Opinions On Fake Boobs

Women have it hard. We’re expected to be perfect but not fake. We’re expected too be sexy but not too sexual (hello: “slut,” “whore,” etc). The double standards are tough, and there’s a lot of pressure to be young, beautiful and in shape. And because of all of that — along with other very valid personal reasons, of course — people turn to plastic surgery. So, when I started talking to people about plastic surgery, it turned out that a lot of men had opinions they super needed to share … about fake breasts. And while I’d like for our body, our choice to be as far as the body conversation goes, it’s kind of funny — and, at times, illuminating — to hear men wax on about breasts.

1 . Dan, 29

“I’m not sure why everyone knocks them, really. Maybe it’s not the nicest thing to admit, but fake tits are round, perky and fun to play with. It’s actually more about the look than the size, because I’m not even into those insane giant ones. So what if they feel a little hard? I’m all about the exaggerated female form (and I know that’s really shitty to say out loud) but any guy is not telling the truth if they don’t like that — fake or not. Like, for me, a dream date would be one of those playboy bunnies and a steak dinner. Don’t hate me.”

2.  Lee, 23

“Honestly? They make me cringe. I dislike fake boobs in every way and in every context. No one who likes putting their mouth on boobs like silicon or saline. Come on.”

3. Jared, 29

“I find fake breasts off-putting and slightly grotesque. I like small boobs. Large ones just seem like too much to handle, haha.”

4. Hunter, 31

“I’ve been married twice — once to a woman with big implants and now to a woman who is basically flat-chested. Do I like a little meat to hold on to? Of course. But whose breasts did I like more? My current wife. They feel real and soft and I could nuzzle into them.”

5. Daniel, 36

“Fake tits, sadly, in 95% of cases, are not warranted and ruin the boobs that were there before. I obviously understand anyone who needs or wants fake boobs because of a mastectomy or because someone has literally zero breast and maybe feels uncomfortable. But going from an A to a D will look awful. Smaller implants are usually way better. Beautiful, small, perky, well-shaped tits are ruined when women put in these balloons. It’s not more female. I’m sad society teaches women that.”

6. Vic, 30

“It might look good, but only in clothes and only with cleavage. As soon as that person is naked, it just doesn’t look realistic. Sorry, nope. They feel so fake — it’s like somebody wearing a Halloween mask. You can tell it’s not a real boob. There’s something psychologically weird about that.”

7. Carlos, 28

“There are almost no cases where fake boobs enhance the woman’s breasts, and in the few seldom cases they do, they’re not extreme implants. The woman usually has some boob meat to work with — that’s when it works, which sucks, right?”

8. Andrei, 30

“They look hot. So do real ones. I’m down with all boobs, anytime. Boobs, yay!”

9. Jerome, 32

“If someone needs them for a medical reason, of course that’s fine. I am sure any decent male would be 100% behind that. But big fake boobs are way less good than small ones — even imperfect ones. Give me stretch marks and uneven sizes, I don’t care. I’m into natural women.”

10. Charles, 33

“In porn, my mind sees big fake boobs. Sexy. In reality, I’m like, damn girl…do these hurt you when you sleep? I can’t get my mind off of its weirdness. It’s like robot breasts. I don’t get it. How could a woman want hard balls inside her chest — by choice?”

11. Antonio, 28

“We told women they’re only hot with big tits, so you know what? I guess we have to own up to that. I don’t like them, but I’ll love a woman either way. Because I’m not an asshole. I guess they’re a woman’s choice, but I still somehow feel guilty that women do it. Even if I don’t represent all men.”

Related: 11 Women Confess The Craziest Things They Watch In Porn

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