Calvin Harris Gifted The World With His Massive Bulge And We Might Need A Minute

It’s become increasingly more obvious that T-Swift made a HUGE mistake when she kicked DJ/producer Calvin Harris to the curb. Not only did he appear to be somewhat of a sweetheart, but let’s just say he’s a sight for thirsty eyes. I mean honestly, who knew Harris was hiding washboard abs and a far from average-sized package.

While there has been some speculation about his size before, a recent Insta-pic in honor of his manager’s birthday confirmed that he’s packing some serious heat. Let’s be honest, nothing says happy birthday like a massive bulge.

See Also: Kim K And Calvin Harris Hung Out To Hate On Taylor Swift, Probably


Calvin Harris wished his manager Mark Gillespie a happy birthday via Instagram on Tuesday.

Happy birthday to my manager @gillespiemark I love u

A post shared by Calvin Harris (@calvinharris) on

Harris gifted the world with a photo of himself casually posed next to Gillespie in nothing but his tidy whities. Let’s just say, we ain’t even a little bit mad about it. If the 6 pack and V-cut weren’t enough to make your mouth water, just let your eyes wander on down a little further…

Looks like Orlando Bloom isn’t the only one with a monstrous bulge.

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Of course, Harris didn’t even acknowledge his scantily clad and glorious presence. He simply captioned the photo “Happy birthday to my manager @gillespiemark I love u.”

Let’s be honest, it was really a present to the entire thirsty world.

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We see you Calvin, you aren’t fooling anyone. Can we just have a minute alone please?

And the comment section was all of us.

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Well played, @nishthabhalla well played.

ICYMI, this isn’t the first time Harris has graced the world with his godly physique. His group Speedo pic had us feeling real light headed.

We said YES

A post shared by Emil Nava (@emilnava) on

We said yes and yes some more.

Not to mention this photo he posted while training on tour.

Who looks like that?? Calvin Fucking Harris, that’s who.

And we can’t even find words for this…

#EmporioArmani

A post shared by Calvin Harris (@calvinharris) on

It just got very, very warm in here.

Needless to say, T-Swift might want to rethink that breakup.

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Related-ish: Orlando Bloom’s Massive Dick Shadow Is Making People Thirsty AF

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