31 Pumpkin Spice Abominations That Will Bring Society To Its Knees

The onslaught of Pumpkin Spice fall products is annoying for a myriad of reasons. 1.) People won’t stop bitching about pumpkin spice products and 2.) pumpkin spice products are everywhere. What started out as a simple autumnal coffee drink has grown into a full-on craze for all that is reminiscent of the seasonal gourd.

Here are just a few of the aforementioned products that, in addition to being pumpkin spice-flavored, are also totally unnecessary. I mean, who asked for a pumpkin spice room spray anyway? Anybody? What about pumpkin spice salmon? Whose to blame for that one, huh?

I have no idea what this plethora of pumpkin inventions means for our society, but I know it definitely can’t be good.

Related-ish: 7 Signs Your Love For Pumpkin Spice Lattes Isn’t Just A Phase, It’s A Lifestyle

1. Pumpkin Spice Cheerios

So you literally never have to stop stuffing your face with artificial pumpkin flavoring!

2. Pumpkin Spice Cream Cheese

“My bagel is round, it should obviously taste like a pumpkin.”

3. Pumpkin Spice Salsa

Because peppers just aren’t trendy anymore.

4. Pumpkin Spice Fristed Mini-Wheats

What else are you gonna eat when you’re tired of your Pumpkin Spice Cheerios??

5. Pumpkin Spice Kitty Litter

The best way to shit all over Pumpkin Spice culture, TBH.

6. Pumpkin Spice Dog Cologne

In case your dog was jealous of your cat’s hip new kitty litter.

7. Pumpkin Spice Chicken Sausage

“I even want my MEAT to remind me of the spirit of the fall season!!!”

8. Pumpkin Spice Salmon

For all you Pumpkin Spice Pescatarians.

9. Pumpkin Spice Bagels

Because you ALREADY HAVE THE PUMPKIN SPICE CREAM CHEESE.

10. Pumpkin Spice Almonds

Why should your almonds taste like almonds when they could just taste like something completely different?

11. Pumpkin Spice Truffles

SURE. FINE. WHY NOT.

12. Pumpkin Spice Marshmallows

I swear to God, if I see a recipe for pumpkin spice s’mores …

13. Pumpkin Spice Peeps

For those of you who are too snobby for the generic old Pumpkin Spice Marshmallows.

14. Pumpkin Spice Hummus

I feel like this is probably offensive to multiple cultures, somehow.

15. Pumpkin Spice Water

Mmm, spicy water! Sounds delicious!

16. Pumpkin Spice Whipped Topping

We both know this is going right on top of a pumpkin pie, so WHY ARE YOU MAKING IT PUMPKIN FLAVORED??

17. Pumpkin Spice Yogurt Pretzels

Yogurt pretzels, clean yourself up. You’re better than this.

18. Pumpkin Spice Lip Balm

So you NEVER, EVER have to stop tasting pumpkin spice on the tip of your tongue.

19. Pumpkin Spice Pringles

GET OUT OF MY LUNCH BOX.

20. Pumpkin Spice Gum

“Your breath smells like fresh … pumpkins?”

21. Pumpkin Spice Twinkies

You can do all the flavoring you want, but this is still just a damn Twinkie.

22. Pumpkin Spice Hershey’s Kisses

How DARE you recreate a Hershey’s product with LESS chocolate??

23. Pumpkin Spice M&M’s

Like tiny, cinnamon poops!

24. Pumpkin Spice Eggos

HAHAHA MY REFRIGERATOR IS NOT SAFE.

25. Multiple Pumpkin Spice Air Fresheners

Because capitalism requires that there must be competitors in all realms.

26. Pumpkin Spice Jello-O

THIS IS JUST PIE FILLING, SHUT UP.

27. Pumpkin Spice Oreos

STOP RUINING MY LIFE.

28. Pumpkin Spice Vodka

*Barfs uncontrollably forever*

29. Pumpkin Spice Ravioli

YOU MUST EAT PUMPKIN FOR EVERY MEAL.

30. Pumpkin Spice Pasta Sauce

To put all over your Pumpkin Spice Pasta, obviously!

31. Pumpkin Spice Car Freshener

SO YOU CAN NEVER ESCAPE THE FRAGRANCE OF AUTUMN, EVER.

Related-ish: 9 Fall Wines Under $20 That You Can Pair With Pumpkin Spice Anything

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