12 Products That Save Your Ass When You’re a New Mom

When I was five months pregnant, I walked into a Buy Buy Baby for the very first time in my life. My husband and I were there to begin the daunting task of creating a registry. Within 11 minutes, I got so overwhelmed that I walked out and didn’t return for, like, two more months. I mean, there are So. Many. Things. in that store. And how are you supposed to know which thing of all of those things is “the best” one to buy? There are 14 different varieties of the same item. Every parent wants the best for their baby, right? So why would you spend $79.99 on a swing and be a shitty parent when you can be the greatest parent ever and spend $179.99 on this other model?

These marketing moguls have us by the proverbial ball sacks, and I was definitely a sucker. I over-registered for sure and was left needing things I didn’t get and getting things I didn’t need. I now give out my cell phone numbers to future moms as a hotline they can call so I can school them on the real deal. There are products you and your baby need, and then, there are the products that, as a mom, actually save your ass. Here, the latter.

Related-ish: 10 Women Get Honest About The Weird Ways They Got Pregnant

1. Camilia teething relief

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Baby teeth can come as early as four months and the insane pain these munchkins feel can really throw them off-kilter. Their eating and sleeping habits can change, so just when you think you’ve got a great thing going with a schedule, teething can really fuck up your game. Camilia teething medicine relieves their swollen gums. Bonus: The active ingredients are homeopathic.

Get it HERE

2. Doggie bags


You don’t really think you need to buy specialty diaper poop bags for your baby’s shit, do you? Use regular ol’ doggie poop bags. Throw a roll or two in your diaper bag so you always have them handy.

Get them HERE

3. DockATot


Think of it as a snuggling station for your little one. DockATot is a small space that you can take with you wherever you go. It creates a safe platform for napping, tummy time, and even changing. For me, this is essential for long periods of travel or going off to the parents’ for the day. I am also a big fan of the Boppy! I take it with me on any flights I take so that my son can nurse and (hopefully) pass the fuck out!

Get it HERE

4. Blueair


There are so many facts out there about the harm that mold, smoke, dust (and other things!) can do to people. When you bring home a newborn baby, all you can think about is how fresh, unharmed, and untouched their lungs are. (You also forget all about the Parliament Lights you smoked throughout your college years.) Make sure to preserve the air your baby is breathing in with an air purifier. Five times an hour, Blue replaces room air that contains contaminants with fresh air.

Get it HERE

5. goze


You might be surprised to see a cell phone case on the list, but if you’re a germophobe type of parent, this is for you. It’s the first and only self-cleaning antimicrobial case. The case material itself actually kills bacteria and microbes you come across on a daily basis. Just think about all the places your phone is as you touch it and then also tend to your little one? Yea … no.

Get it HERE

6. Sudocrem


Fuck all those other diaper rash creams. Sudocream is amazing, and it smells good to boot. You can even use it on any other skin rash or irritation. Tip: Use a dab on the nose as needed when they have a cold. It helps to heel the dry skin from wiping so much.

Get it HERE

7. SmarTrike


When your baby is a itty bitty thing, a stroller is the best and easiest mode of transportation. But as they get bigger, they’re like, “Yo, ma, can you get me the hell out of this thing?” And you’re left looking for the next best shiny new toy. The SmarTrike is designed to transform in stages from a stroller to being pushed in this trike to an actual tricycle when your (not so much) baby can ride on his own. By the way, look at cha-ching you’re saving! This is like a 3-in-1 buy.

Get it HERE

8. ChargeUp


Can you imagine life without your smartphone? Obviously not. Cygnett’s ChargeUp is a portable charger that offers three full charges. It’s also super sturdy, so it can be dropped or even thrown across the room by your little monster baby and still work.

Get it HERE

9. JoJo Pocket Highchair


The struggle is real AF when you’re traveling with a kid. You basically have to bring your entire house with you to feel like you have everything you need. And even then, you don’t. Obviously, your kid needs to eat and obviously you cannot bring a high chair with you. JoJo’s super lightweight travel highchair fits in your purse and unfolds into a seat so your baby can sit securely in any backed chair.

Get it HERE

10. Keekaroo Peanut


An absolute MUST, this diaper changing pad is impermeable to any fluid so cleanup is really easy. You don’t need extra pads or sheets or any of that bullshit. It’s easy to transport, so you can take it with you upstairs, downstairs, or even to the parental units.

Get it HERE

11. Kaffe Cosmetics


Let’s be real: Moms need all the help they can get when it comes to keeping the skin looking energized. Drinking a lot of coffee is one way to help; using it on your face is another. Kaffe products offer a range of creams and oils that help rejuvenate the skin that’s fighting gravity. So keep the coffee in your cup and on your face.

Get it HERE

12. Ta-Ta Towel


Why this wasn’t invented sooner is beyond me. (Then again, shows like Shark Tank wouldn’t exist, right?) Ta-Ta Towel is the perfect accessory to any set of boobs. For the breastfeeding mama, the ultrasoft lining is heaven on those irritated nipples, and it mops up any extra leakage that happens. Can’t rave enough about this. The Ta-Ta Towel also keeps moisture from building up under your chest while you’re getting ready for the day or to go out for the night. (You know, for all those lucky moms who still have a life.) Underboob irritation be gone! Genius, shit you guys. Genius.

Get it HERE

Related-ish: 11 Weird, Awful, And Real Things That Can Happen After Giving Birth

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