Human sexuality is an interesting thing. For one, it’s very private — and that’s why these confessions were made anonymously, and second, our desires don’t necessarily represent who we are in “real life.” So long as sex is consensual and respectful, our fetishes can be harmless displays of our subconscious. Sometimes, unfortunately, our desires stem from trauma or the need for something important missing in our everyday lives. But sometimes, they’re just dirty and fun. Here, 11 people confess what makes them tick in the bedroom. It could be any of us.
1. I really get off when a women gently caresses my hair in a loving manner.
“When women get on top of me and rub my hair and my face as we have sex, like in a compassionate or kind way, I get off, haha. I’m not necessarily passive but I just get off when a girl treats me like a little boy or a weakling…especially near the end of sex. I don’t know why it does it for me. I’m pretty “normal” in the bedroom otherwise, but if someone starts to treat me like a found puppy…all bets are off. I have no problem asking for this, as actually some women kind of like it.” — Brandon, 30
2. I want to be put asleep by someone’s thick thighs wrapped hard around my neck.
“Women squeeze me out with her thighs around my neck. My girlfriend is a buff woman, and I like that. I need muscles. I like erotic asphyxiation. need the woman to beat the shit out of me with her muscles. Not hitting, but squeezing my neck and stomach. I want to be put out, but we have to be careful, obviously, for death reasons…” — Vin, 32
3. My earlobes are the only sexual part of my body.
“I’m not much of a sexual person, actually. I just feel like I don’t need that much sex. Maybe I’m slightly asexual, but every single time someone sucks and bites my earlobes. No where else on my body. Not even my genitals. I can just get off immediately. Obviously this is not something I can do at home alone, which maybe makes me isolated from my own sexuality.” — Trisha, 30
4. I like spit in my mouth.
“Spit in my mouth. The more someone spits in my mouth, gooey and all, the better. I hesitate to ask sometimes, but usually I have sex when I’m drunk and it’s easier to say, “spit in mouth.” One guy didn’t want to one time, he was really turned off, and it ruined the mood.” — Albina, 28
5. I want to be a little slut.
“I need someone to tell me I’m a whore, a little slut. If they want to treat me like a little girl, even better. I wear knee-highs and ask to get spanked over their laps. I know it’s a bad thing because I’m a feminist! But I want to be called a dirty little slut. And punished.” — Monica, 28
6. I want a foot inside me.
“For me, it’s fisting. I don’t care if it’s a foot or a fist, but I like being fisted. We try to incorporate it into bedroom play once per month, as my husband doesn’t necessarily love to watch it happen. I told [him] he could look away…I guess it reminds him of the birth of our children, which is about the time I started getting into it. I’d research videos and find it so fascinating — this complete lack of control and body autonomy, and the fact that it’s so wrong.” — Leah, 29
7. I want you to whisper in another language.
“I don’t know how to put this. I am really into when girls whisper into my ear…in another language preferably. I tend to date a lot of Korean or Japanese women, so I have them whisper to me in their language. I honestly can’t determine why this turns me on. It could be that I watched a lot of porn with those types of women, or if it’s the idea that I’m in this exotic place and can’t really understand what’s going on? I’m just so into it. I’ll date American women, of course. It’s just not the same.” — Dan, 31
8. I’m into full bush.
“I prefer a girl with a full bush. I want to put my face in it. I want to smell it. I am super down with hairy armpits too. I just love that natural look and the way hair gets extra dirty. 70s porno all the way!” — Lee, 27
9. I like when we have sex in my sister-in-law’s bedroom…when she’s home.
“I want to be in public. We like to fuck in stairwells in a busy building or on the roof of my building (which is bad because it’s public and frequented by a lot of my neighbors that I know) or in a bathroom. I am only steps away from being caught. I guess it’s pretty normal, right? Except that I love to have sex in my parents or sister-in-law’s house with the door pretty open. I don’t know how I’d recover from being caught but that’s what I like so much about it.” — Claire, 33
10. I’m a man who wants my nipples bitten.
“I’m really turned on by nippled play. Clamps and biting mostly. I don’t care for it on women, but on me, I mean. When all my past girlfriends sucked on them really hard and I could…finish quickly.” — Raul, 30
11. The idea of a life and sex slave turns me on.
“Ever since I was about six or seven, I was fascinated with the idea of a slave. Someone who could do things for me. I don’t know where I picked this up, but I’d bully the other kids. This has clearly informed my sex life now, and I wish it wasn’t the case. So far, I’ve found only one female partner (I’m bisexual) who indulged me by playing my slave in and out of the bedroom. It’s not like 50 Shades at all. It’s more literal. I know this is a problem, but it gets me off to make her go to the store for me or clean my house while I watch tv. I have issues with non consent and gender roles, but sex exists outside of this for me. This has 100% hindered my sex and love life and I wish I could make it go away. Porn doesn’t really even do it for me.” — Mark, 29