Here’s What The Sinners Are Buying On Amazon This Week

First and foremost, congratulations for surviving your work week. Lord knows this one seemed never-ending, but the weekend is finally here and that means the return of the one and only Sinners of Amazon list.

We know you’ve been eager to see what the deviants are shopping for this week, so without further ado please enjoy the kinkiest of kinky, craziest of crazy, and most WTF items on the best-sellers category.

Warning: Definitely NSFW

1. Sexflesh Suction Cup Dildo, Pink

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First on our list is this aggressive-looking bright pink dildo. Yes, those are balls attached, even though they bear little to no resemblance to the real deal. Aside from it’s slightly disturbing color tone, Amazon reviewers give this monster of a toy a solid 5 stars saying it’s “just the right size and fits comfortably during use.”

Get it HERE

2. Shalleen Sex Swing for Couples

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If you’re sex life could use a little spice, Amazon shoppers recommend this sex swing for couples. According to the reviews, there’s a bit of a learning curve when you first put it to use, but it’s totally worth the extra work. “It’s a fun thing to have and a new way to spice up the play time, though it is a bit complicated to do the first or second time around!”

Get it HERE

 3. Pecker Ring Toss by Ozze Creations

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This Pecker Toss game could not be a more perfect bachelorette party gift. I mean, why play regular ring toss when you can score one on a giant penis?

Get it HERE

4. Fleshlight Alien Male Masturbator

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Another week, another disturbing AF Fleshlight. Perusing Amazon today, led me to this blue “Alien Male Masturbator.” Yes, ALIEN. Apparently, guys really get off to the whole supernatural creature persona. Nope, no thank you.

Get it HERE

5. Nailed Joint Leather Posture Collar With Pull Ring

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While this is slightly less disturbing than some of the bondage-esque products we’ve had in the past weeks, I’m still not sure how I feel about wearing what looks like a dog collar during sex. No judgements though, to each their own.

Get it HERE

6. Dancing Boobies

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Because who doesn’t love a pair of dancing boobies? We honestly might be purchasing these for office party stocking stuffers.

Get it HERE

7. Little Genie Sweeten’ D Blow Oral Pleasure Gel

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Anything to make blowjobs a little more pleasurable, is never a bad thing. Amazon shoppers suggest this product for partners who want a little more flavor when they go downtown. “Very good tasting lubricant with a nice consistency. The vanilla taste is very reminiscent of ice cream.” Delicious.

Get it HERE

8. 3 Bangs For Your Butt Suction Butt Plug

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Dear god, not 1 not 2, but 3 heads on a butt plug. I don’t even know how to feel about this, maybe a little terrified, tbh. Shoppers are loving this bad boy though saying “the stretch is incredibly arousing , when each head is inserted your hole stretches to accommodate the size.”

Get it HERE

9. Toughage Soft Inflatable Sex Ramp Pillow

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Not going to lie, this is the first product on our list so far that I would be interested in trying out. This soft inflatable sex pillow is not only great for intimate time with your partner, but it can hold a dildo or vibrator in position for personal pleasure.

Get it HERE

10. Middle Finger Socks

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I need these middle finger socks in my life like, now. Next time someone annoys the living shit out of you, you can just show them your socks and walk away, PERFECT.

Get it HERE

11.  Romantic Sm Nipple Clamps with Small Bells

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Though I’ve never been a big fan of nipple clamps, these are pretty cute. Amazon reviewers give them a big thumbs up too; “These nipple clamps are completely adjustable, so if gentle is more your thing, you can do that, or if you’re into hardcore pain=pleasure kind of person, they’ll work great for you too. The bells on the end are very fun and cute, and the part that is actually on your nipple is soft enough that you don’t have to worry that it will hurt if you pull them off (whether intentional or otherwise.)”

Get it HERE

12. Womanizer The Pro Vibrator, Red Roses

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This pro vibrator is said to be one of the best on the market right now and we might just be tempted to try it out. Especially after reading one satisfied customer’s review: “I just got finished using it for the first time and my entire body feels like snow on the tv screen.” Um, yes.

Get it HERE

13.  Sexflesh Bodacious Bella Breast Stroker

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There’s always one item every week that really makes us wonder about humanity as a whole. This is that product. While we do understand the appeal of a nice pair of breasts, these just seem a little creepy by themselves. According to the product description, “the detailed pink nipples are perfect for pinching while you get your satisfaction from those delicious D cups.” WOW, just wow.

Get it HERE

See Also: 23 Ladies Who Made us LOL This Week (And 1 token dude)

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