Here’s What The Sinners Are Buying On Amazon This Week

It’s that time of the week again ladies and gents, when we scower the deepest darkest corners of Amazon’s Best Seller List to find out what the deviants are shopping for.

Believe it or not, this roundup may be even more cringeworthy than last week’s, if that’s possible. Set your browser to private because it’s about to get pretty NSFW up in here.

1. Mr-S-Leather World’s Most Comfortable Butt Plug

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First up on this week’s list is the “World’s Most Comfortable Butt Plug.” The title alone is the majority of the reason we chose this product, but it also has some pretty stellar Amazon reviews. Shoppers gave this plug 5 stars saying it’s “so comfortable, and yet satisfying, even after getting off.”

Get it HERE

2. Bigbanana Butterfly Dildo Vibrator

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We couldn’t help but giggle at the name on this particular gadget, but that’s not the only reason we chose it. Customers raved about this vibrating dildo and gave it a solid 5 stars. Plus, it’s probably one of the cheaper toys out there.

Get it HERE

3. Knock Knock Why I Must Have Sex With You Pad

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I seriously want to buy one of these and hold on to them for special occasions. They seem like the perfect way to liven up a relationship and give your partner a good laugh.

Get it HERE

4. Riodong 3D Realistic Masturbator

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Male masturbators are generally pretty disturbing on their own imho, but this one right here is just on another level. There’s something about those teeth that I just can’t get past. According to the product description, its updated design is “closer to the real female’s mouth with the tongue and teeth.” No thank you.

Get it HERE

5. Sex Checks

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Okay, these are pretty great. They’re like little naughty coupons that you can redeem with your SO. Not to mention, they make the perfect last minute gift when you happen to forget about a birthday or anniversary.

Get it HERE

6. Icicles No 8 Hand Blown Glass Massager

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This honestly might be the prettiest dildo we’ve ever seen. I mean, it’s literally called “Icicle.” If Elsa from Frozen had a sex toy, it would be this. According to the product description, “this luxurious line of glass massagers will leave you breathless.” Not mad about it, ladies.

Get it HERE

7. Pin the Macho on the Man

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Obviously this item is probably sold primarily for bachelorette party uses, but it’s just too funny not to add to our list this week. All of those uniquely designed dongs are absolutely priceless. Maybe we’ll just need to order one of these for the office.

Get it HERE

8. Vibrating Shower Massager

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This seemingly innocent-looking strawberry sponge is actually a descrete vibrator for bath time. Pretty cool idea right? According to one very satisfied customer, “it’s something unique and exciting for foreplay for couples or even to relax with in your own time.”

Get it HERE

9. Passion Spearmint Clit Sensitizer

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Our past “Sinners” lists have included one or two oral stimulators for men, but it’s about time we included one for women! This spearmint clit sensitizer is said to “heighten clitoral awareness while adding a cooling sensation.” One reviewer says it can also be used to create a tingling sensation on the nipples.

Get it HERE

10. I Rub My Duckie Toy

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Apparently, a lot of shoppers this week are focused on bath time pleasure. This rubber duckie is not the kind you had as a kid. It’s a soothing personal massager perfect for when you need some alone time after a long day.

Get it HERE

11. Pecker Pistol Water Gun

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We will definitely be ordering more than one of this ridiculous product to use on our coworkers. I mean, who comes up with this stuff? A penis water gun, really?

Get it HERE

12. Sexflesh Felicity Blow Job

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There’s always one item every week that makes my skin crawl and this is the one. Not only is the face absolutely horrifying, but it’s literally just a head. No body, no nothing. Just a creepy ass severed head. Nope, nope.

Get it HERE

13. Fresh Gag, Ball, Pink/blue

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The last item on our list is a blue and pink ball gag. If there was ever a “cute” ball gag, I feel like this would be the one. While it’s not really my cup of tea, several reviewers rave that this product is just what they were looking for.

Get it HERE

See Also: The Perfect 15 Song Playlist To Scream-Sing When You Ditch Your F*ckboy

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