Relationships are never as simple as we’d like them to be. Sure, in the beginning it seems like nothing but rainbows and butterflies and great sex, but nothing can stay perfect forever. Your significant other becomes a partner, someone who you can turn to when you need help and someone you will inevitably fight with even over the smallest issues.
Several couples who’ve managed to stay together and make their partnership work for years and years decided to share their most vital advice for new SO’s on Reddit. So, if you’re in a new relationship you may want to seriously study these responses.
1. spicespecialist is a practical companion.
Be a team. Most couples don’t know the right way to fight (and there WILL be fights). Don’t worry about which one of you is “right.” Remember that it’s you and your partner vs. the problem, not you vs. your partner.
2. HaroldSax insists positivity is key.
Talk to your spouse and stay positive as often as possible. Those two things will make any relationship function better than someone who is closed off and bitter.
3. Thank you, paladin400 I couldn’t agree more.
Have a life, don´t let your partner become “your life”. Otherwise you´ll become needy and that´s incredibly unattractive
4. XMoeXx helps us put the shoe on the other foot.
Be understanding and try to see the situation from your partners point of view.
Also applies to all problems and disputes in life.
5. LesbianAndroid, better to have loved and lost right?
Invest yourself. Everyone always says “don’t get too invested, it’ll only hurt when you get burned,” but you know what? The greatest things in life were built over time, through hard work and dedication and passion. If you want to build a relationship, start with a good foundation, and don’t quit until you’re done. Make the relationship your passion-child, and put every drop of emotion your partner deserves.
6. All men could take a note from Saintblack
Don’t get pee on the toilet.
7. whatisthisidontevenf has learned the power of communication.
Learn to listen rather than talk over one another. Communication is key to a great relationship.
8. MyHeartSomeWhatBroke says to go all in.
Don’t be afraid to be the one who loves the most.
9. Amen, Djernaes, Amen.
Do not enter one before you are able to live comfortable alone. Your happiness should not solemnly depend on being with some one. I known too many who got into a relationship after a breakup before they learned to truly be in a healthy relationship with themselves.
10. Admiral_Burrito is more of a realist.
Accept that it’s not going to be roses and rainbows all the time. Accept that it may be your fault when that happens.
Do your best to communicate effectively to minimize misunderstandings.
Nurture the relationship, but don’t lose yourself in the process.
11. R-E-S-P-E-C-T is Slouchy87‘s motto.
Respect one another. this above all else, even communication, has done us well.
12. tst3c, well put.
A relationship is like a fart- if you have force it, it’s probably shit
13. CutestBoy, again communication is important.
Communicate and confront your issues. If something is wrong, don’t bottle it up inside you. Confront it. Speak to your SO about it. Be honest with yourself.
Also, don’t let yourself go. Just because you’re in a relationship, doesn’t mean you “finished the race.” You are still your own person, don’t ever forget that.
14. An interesting metaphor, eggre.
Same as in throwing a baseball: hold it like an egg. If you’re too intensely focused on your relationship (out of insecurity, adoration, etc.), you’re just going to make the other person pull back, which will make you want to “squeeze” even harder.
15. sarbiur, yes and yes.
Be yourself, always.
16. My ex could use a little advice from traitor_swift.
Don’t be a possessive asshat.