20 Breakup Excuses You Definitely Shouldn’t Try Over The Holidays

While the “it’s not you it’s me” quote is quite bullshit, it’s usually used to prevent hurting someone further by dodging the real truth.  Some like this strategy while others prefer to get a hell of a lot more real about why they truly dislike you.

For example, pet peeves tend to be trigger points that are hard to push aside.  Sometimes it’s the little things that are the big deal breakers.  It’s about to get brutally honest in here.

1. It could be your odor.

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2.  You’re not a fun dinner date.

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3. Crazy conspiracies might be a turn off.

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4. Your head is too damn huge.

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5. Maybe you have a permanent face distraction.people_broke_up_18

 

6. Coffee rituals might get in the way.

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7. Because exercising is hard.

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8. Sometimes fingering doesn’t workout.

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9. You bought DVR for a reason.people_broke_up_13

10. You might talk weird.

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11. Because you walk like a turtle.

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12. Because you eat in slow motion.

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13.  Open mouths aren’t always a winner.

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14.  Because he can’t take you anywhere. people_broke_up_07

15. He wasn’t a T. Rex. fan.

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16.  It’s not you, it’s your mouth…?

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17. Making decisions can be hard.

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18. Mustard + Licking + Hands = Fail.

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19.  Because someone had to rip the bandaid.

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20.  He literally couldn’t unsee it.

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