Here’s What The Sinners Are Buying On Amazon This Week

It’s finally that time of the week again, when we peel off our masks of professionalism and good behavior to really cut loose. Of course, there’s really no better way to kick off a weekend full of shenanigans than by perusing through our list of Amazon’s NSFW best sellers.

Just because Valentine’s Day is over doesn’t mean the excitement in the bedroom has to slow down. So, switch your browser to incognito and get to shopping. You’ll thank us later.


1. This hot pink Lyps Athena vibrator


First on this week’s list is a bright pink vibrator that’s guaranteed to take care of all the right spots. Satisfied customers give the product a 4.5 stars, “I must say very impressive, very interesting selection of vibration settings, great selection of speeds. Made from great feeling materials, strong vibrations, recharges easy. You can set it so one end or the other or both vibrate.”

Get it on Amazon for $26.99

2. This 7-piece bondage belt set


If you found yourself slightly curious about the BDSM world after watching the 50 Shades sequel last weekend, this product might be right up your alley. According to its review, these belts are comfortable to use and “leave boundless imagination for players to experience sexual games.”

Get it on Amazon for $18.59

3. This We-Vibe adjustable couples vibrator


Couples on the lookout for a toy that is mutually pleasurable, check out this adjustable couples vibrator from We-Vibe. One reviewer gave the product 5 stars calling it, “One of the best toys ever. you can have sex with it, tease her, take your time, really get on it. Amazing. ”

Get it on Amazon for $159.00

4. This real dickhead t-shirt

screen shot 2017 02 17 at 2 07 07 pm Heres What The Sinners Are Buying On Amazon This Week

This next product might be one of the stupidest things we’ve ever seen, but it’s undeniably hilarious. So, the next time you find yourself in a situation with a real dickhead, offer him this shirt. Maybe he’ll get the message.

Get it on Amazon for $15.50

5. These Spartacus bell nipple clamps


This pair of nipple clamp bells is another hot buy on Amazon this week for BDSM enthusiasts. The small silver bells ring as they move so if you and your partner have the house to yourselves this might be a fun way to spice things up without arousing suspicion.

Get it on Amazon for $11.96

6. This edible body paint kit


Tbh, I’ve always wanted to try one of these kits. It’s essentially an edible paste that you can paint your partner with and then eat off of them. This particular set comes with 4 flavors; Passion Fruit, Cherry, Pina Colada, and Strawberry.

Get it on Amazon for $13.42

7. This travel sized Rub My Duckie toy for women


Ladies, this may look like your ordinary rubber duckie, but it’s definitely no children’s toy. This is for adult bath time. “I Rub My Duckie” is a vibrating rubber duck that goes in the bath with you when you need a little “alone time.” Reviewers say its the perfect discreet, yet powerful massager.

Get it on Amazon for $18.81

8. These NSFW fortune cookies


If you’ve been looking for the perfect gag gift for your partner, these NSFW fortune cookies might be just what you need. Each fortune is inscribed with something naughty or disturbing and will definitely induce fits of laughter.

Get it on Amazon for $17.00

9. These doggie style sex straps


This powerful strap is ideal for couples who enjoy doggy style more than most. According to its product description, it “allows for deeper penetration and G spot stimulation and increases angles of penetration.”

Get it on Amazon for $9.98

10. This “Salty Bitch” coffee mug


This may be my favorite product on our list this week. Instead of confronting that one coworker who always seems to be in a bad mood, you can just bring them a hot mug of coffee and make sure they see the label.

Get it on Amazon for $10.01

11.  This Jenna Haze fleshlight


If fleshlights are your thing, this special addition Jenna Haze model is an Amazon favorite. Reviewers give the product a solid 5 stars saying, “this is fun to use and really provides amazing stimulation. I recommend this to anyone that owns a fleshlight.”

Get it on Amazon for $79.95

12. This “Maybe You Touched Your Genitals” hand sanitizer


Please buy this for that one nasty friend who refuses to wash their damn hands. It’s so ridiculous they may just use it and you’ll get a kick out of sharing it with your coworkers and friends.

Get it on Amazon for $6.29

13. This willie egg frier


Last, but certainly not least is this breakfast favorite that allows you to make your eggs or pancakes in the shape of a penis. Because why TF not?

Get it on Amazon for $9.76

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