If you woke up with a serious case of the Mondays today, it might be time to put things in perspective.
Here are some individuals who had a much rougher weekend than you did, and probably need a pretty stiff drink right about now — so stop your whining and just be thankful, mmkay?
1. Reputable news outlets.
On Friday, news publications which included the New York Times, Politico, and CNN were blocked from attending a White House media “gaggle.” (Which is kind of like a press conference, but informal and open only to members of the media.) No administration for either party has ever barred an accredited news organization from attending a briefing before.
The move came after Donald Trump gave a blustery speech at the Conservative Political Action Conference on Friday, in which he once again accused the media of being dishonest.
It’s tempting to be horrified by this breach in precedent. However, it is unlikely that these news organizations will allow these petty and vindictive measures to prevent them from doing their job.
As the New York Times Editorial Board wrote in their statement on the matter:
That First Amendment can be inconvenient for anyone longing for power without scrutiny. Mr. Trump might want to brush up on what it means, and get used to it.
2. Meryl Streep and Karl Lagerfeld
In a highly ill-advised move, designer Karl Lagerfeld smeared America’s beloved Meryl Streep this weekend.
Lagerfeld originally claimed that Chanel was designing a dress for Streep to wear to the Oscars, but that Streep later pulled out because another designer had offered to pay her to wear their dress, instead. As Huffington Post reports:
“‘Don’t continue the dress. We found somebody who will pay us,'” he told Women’s Wear Daily of the call. “After we gift her a dress that’s 100,000 euros ($105,000), we found later we had to pay (for her to wear it). We give them dresses, we make the dresses, but we don’t pay.”
“A genius actress, but cheapness also, no?” he added.
Though Lagerfeld later a vague and unconvincing apology, Meryl was understandably peeved about being called “cheap,” and drafted a salty response which denied that she was paid to wear another dress.
According to People, Streep’s statement reads:
In reference to Mr. Lagerfeld’s ‘statement,’ there is no ‘controversy’: Karl Lagerfeld, a prominent designer, defamed me, my stylist, and the illustrious designer whose dress I chose to wear, in an important industry publication. That publication printed this defamation, unchecked. Subsequently, the story was picked up globally, and continues, globally, to overwhelm my appearance at the Oscars, on the occasion of my record breaking 20th nomination, and to eclipse this honor in the eyes of the media, my colleagues and the audience. I do not take this lightly, and Mr. Lagerfeld’s generic ‘statement’ of regret for this ‘controversy’ was not an apology. He lied, they printed the lie, and I am still waiting.
Shit. The Oscar weekend may have ended on a more positive note for Meryl (though she did not win, she did get her own standing ovation from the audience), but the feud likely left a sour taste in her mouth.
3. Nicki Minaj
Okay, I don’t have to time or energy to completely re-hash the Nicki Minaj/Remy Ma feud for you guys, but, suffice it to say: there is one.
This weekend, rapper Remy Ma brought this feud full-circle by releasing a seven-minute track called shETHER which contains some pretty savage disses about Minaj.
One particularly ruthless verse contains accusations about Minaj getting plastic surgery:
And I saw Meek at All-Star, he told me your ass dropped
He couldn’t fuck you for three months because your ass dropped
Now I don’t think y’all understand how bad her ass got
The implants that she had put in her ass popped
Though Nicki has responded to the diss track with some Instagram snapshots, it’s clear that she’s going to have to actually spit some lyrics if she wants to craft an actual clapback.
Until then, she might need some ice for those burns.
4. Matt Damon
Jimmy Kimmel hosted the Academy Awards this weekend, so it was only natural for him to use the opportunity to play up his ongoing fake-feud with actor Matt Damon.
In addition to enthusiastically dismissing Damon in his opening monologue, Kimmel made a point of dragging Damon at every possible moment during the awards ceremony. From mocking Damon’s performance in We Bought A Zoo, to conducting the orchestra over Damon’s presenter speech, the whole ceremony was essentially a highly-produced Matt Damon roast.
If he wasn’t rich, famous and attractive, I’d almost feel sorry for him.
5. La La Land
You know what happened. You saw the damn thing. But here’s a recap anyway: Warren Beatty accidentally announced that La La Land won for Best Picture, when in reality, the Oscar went to Moonlight.
Great news for everyone who was hoping that Moonlight would take home a well-deserved Best Picture win.
Pretty rough and awkward for everyone involved in La La Land, though. Yeesh.