Nordstrom Is Selling These Mud-Smeared Jeans For $425, In Case You’re A Wealthy Farmhand

Nordstrom is no stranger to tacking an exorbitant price tag on preposterous items that no one in their right might would willingly spend $20 on, let alone hundreds of dollars. It wasn’t so long ago that the company attempted to sell a rock in a leather pouch for a whopping $85. (As though you wouldn’t bargain hunt if you were buying a rock in a pouch? C’mon, guys.)

And now, Nordstrom’s penchant for the expensive and ridiculous has reared its well-groomed head yet again, in the form of jeans that are … already caked in mud.

Feast your eyes on the Barracuda Straight Leg Jeans. They cost you a cool $425, and come pre-smeared with some sort of brown grime (which is described as mud, but could easily be mistaken for poop).

nordstrom is selling these mud smeared jeans for 425 in case youre a wealthy farmhand 2 Nordstrom Is Selling These Mud Smeared Jeans For $425, In Case Youre A Wealthy Farmhand

The site describes the jeans as:

Heavily distressed medium-blue denim jeans in a comfortable straight-leg fit embody rugged, Americana workwear that’s seen some hard-working action with a crackled, caked-on muddy coating that shows you’re not afraid to get down and dirty.

(Um, I think Nordstrom is taking serious liberties with the usage of the term “heavily distressed.”)

Okay, I have several issues with these jeans, so let’s break this down:

  1. $425 is kind of a ridiculous price tag for casual jeans. Especially if you’re supposed to be roping cattle with them, or something.
  2.  If you can afford $400 jeans, why do you need people to think you’ve been rolling around in the mud/trampled by steer?
  3. If you do need people to think you’ve been rolling around in the mud, couldn’t you just actually roll around in the mud, or something?
  4. Honestly, what kind of household task requires getting this much mud on yourself in the first place??

I will probably never get the answers to these questions, but at least I can take comfort in the fact that, should I ever become a very wealthy mud-wrestler, my uniform will be waiting for me.

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