When I was single, my friends tried to constantly give me advice. Luckily, I didn’t take it. Now they give advice to each other and everyone else around them, but I wish they’d all just stop. I love my friends, but they give terrible dating advice that no one in their right mind should follow.
1. None of them have even found love.
They’re all still single ladies. If they haven’t found love, then why the hell do they feel like they’re in a good place to advise others on it? That doesn’t make any sense. They aren’t experts on love if they can’t even figure out their own dating lives. In all honesty, they have no business giving advice on a subject they truly don’t anything about.
2. They don’t know how to have mature relationships.
They still play mind games. They love to test just how much a man likes them and they encourage me to do the same. They think that women are always right and men are always wrong. They want to live some fairytale fantasy where guys put up with anything they do and still treat them like princesses, but that’s unrealistic. All I ever wanted is an equal partner and that’s exactly what I found… by disregarding all of their bad advice.
3. They have horrible dating histories.
Looking back at their past relationships, I can’t believe the men that are their actual exes. These are guys I would never even consider dating casually, let alone being in a relationship with them. Some of my friends are relationship hoppers while others have never even had a serious relationship to speak of. Their dating histories are a tangled mess of lies, betrayals, and men who weren’t worth giving the time of day. When it comes to advice, I have no idea what they’re basing their “knowledge” on.
4. They’ve been played way too many times.
A man, however, has never once fooled me. I’ve never dated a player. I’m just not attracted to that type of man. A guy feeding me lines in a bar does nothing for me. I’m looking for real connections with a decent guy who doesn’t obsess over being “the man” to all his bros. I’ve never wanted to date the big man on top because I could never stand to be around that kind of ego. For me, players just simply aren’t attractive.
5. They have no clue how to spot red flags.
When they introduce a man to the group, I just want to shake my head. I don’t know where they find these guys because I can spot multiple red flags from the very first time I meet them. I love my girls, but they all have a serious problem with falling for players. I try to warn them but at the end of the day, they have to make their own mistakes — and they always get burned.
6. They’re way too into keeping things casual.
That’s just not me. I’m a relationship girl. Love is what I want. They know that, but for some reason, they think staying casual is how you get serious with someone. It’s like they’re trying to convince guys they’re these laid-back girls who aren’t needy in the slightest and once they’re in, they trick the dudes into falling for them. It’s some crazy logic I just can’t get behind, and it’s definitely not working for them.
6. They encourage me to waste my time.
They think that I just don’t give guys enough of a chance, but the reality is I just don’t waste time on men I’m not interested in. If I don’t feel a spark, I’m out. It’s like they think I should give my number to any guy who asks and go out with just any guy. I never wanted just any guy, I wanted the guy, and that’s what they don’t get.
7. They always want me to keep my options open.
I don’t like dating more than one person at a time, but they do. I want to focus on one guy at a time so that I can figure out if I really like someone and they get a real chance with me. Even after I met the love of my life. They encouraged me not to date him exclusively. They encouraged me to date around and keep a backup plan, but I would never jeopardize a relationship with a guy I really care about by making shady moves like that.
8. If I had taken their advice, I wouldn’t be with the man I’m with today.
He’s the man of my dreams, but if I’d listened to them, he would have run for the hills a long time ago. Men want to be appreciated just like women do, but my friends don’t realize that. They’re too busy trying to hold all the cards, be in charge, and always have a backup plan. They don’t know how to commit fully to one man, but I do, and I’m so glad I never took an ounce of their bad advice.
9. In all honesty, they should be taking advice from me.
I’m the only one of us who’s actually found love. I’m the one who is settled down with the man I’m going to marry. They’re all still in the game playing, so why aren’t they taking advice from someone who’s already won the game? I love my friends, but there is a reason they’re still single. It’s about time they stop trying to give their opinions and start listening to some solid advice from a reputable source.
Kelsey Dykstra is a freelance writer based in Huntington Beach, CA. She has been blogging for over four years and writing her whole life. Originally from Michigan, this warm weather seeker relocated to the OC just last summer. She enjoys writing her own fictional pieces, reading a variety of young adult novels, binging on Netflix, and of course soaking up the sun.