You’ve likely heard the saying, “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” While a powerful sentiment, this isn’t always true. In fact, some words have the ability to completely mess with your head and cause you to question your every action. That being said, Reddit asked its community about the best ways to subtly mind fuck another person and the responses are horrendously genius.
1. Jordan1719 used to mess with his roommate in the worst way.
I would always ask my old roommate “have you seen our toothbrush?”
2. The_Royal_Spoon enjoys confusing strangers.
“Nice to see you again” to someone you just met for the first time.
3. DeadFireFight really threw his manager off.
“Everything everyone told me about you was true”. I once said this to a manager during a disciplinary, it fucked with his head way worse than I anticipated. He was one of those managers that thought he was really popular, but was a bit of a dick. After I said that he was second guessing himself for a good month, really went out of his way to try to be nice afterwards too.
4. morgansometimes had a rather snarky grandmother.
My great grandma would say things along the lines of, “That’s such a nice blouse, if you’re into that sort of thing.”
5. DavosLostFingers beats around the bush.
That’s certainly an interesting way to do it
6. This must be a dude thing, shortadamlewis.
While at a urinal, “nice watch”.
7. This would make me go crazy, PerilousAll.
You don’t have to say anything. Just look at their hair or hairline a tiny bit longer than you normally would, widen your eyes slightly then quickly glance away. Sneak a couple more quick looks during the unrelated conversation. Make it seem like you’re trying not to look.
If they ask you if something is wrong with their hair, say that nothing is wrong. As unconvincingly as possible.
8. generic_brand_cola has us wondering about yesterday.
“Sorry about yesterday”
Give no context. None at all.
9. GreekNord is just cruel.
I used to know a guy that would tell people “nice teeth.” No matter how confident they were in their teeth, it automatically made them self-conscious.
They couldn’t help but wonder if there was something wrong with their teeth.
10. I don’t play golf, but I’m sure toughdeveloper is on to something.
In golf a massive dick move would be to say something like, “do you always grip it so strong with your left hand?” It can ruin there swing for the rest of the round thinking about it.
11. sgursel would seriously traumatize his child.
I was thinking of taking a picture of my 3 year old, getting it digitally aged and hanging on a wall in her room. She was going to grow up looking at that picture, and when she gets older, she was going to realize that it was her, and I was going to tell her that she is a time traveler.
My wife didn’t let me do that 😦
12. DRW0813 is an evil genius.
Don’t say anything. When they are around you scrunch up your nose as if they smell. They will become extremely self conscious. Sticks and stones can break my bones but insecurities give emotional scars that can last a lifetime.
13. That’s a dangerous move, XGueroX.
I start many conversations with “I’m not racist but” and then talk about things that have nothing to do with race. The look of confusion is wonderful.
“I’m not racist but, have you gone to that new park on 4th street. My kids loved it. We went this weekend.”
14. Statscollector likes do drive people mad with his puns.
Just put a few “sorry, no pun intended” into your chats when there was actually no pun. If they call you out on it, just say “really?” with a quizzical look and carry on.
15. pizzati keeps people guessing.
When you’re talking to someone you just look at their ear or slightly just past their head whilst you make conversation.
I know it’s not something you say but it consistently works in making them wonder wtf you’re looking at.
16. titty_jumbalaya, this is my biggest pet peeve.
You look tired.
17. BlondieClashNirvana could really get themselves into trouble.
Creepily say “see you soon” to random strangers.
18. Nspir3 knows how to give someone a heart attack.
“We need to talk”
19. VilePug is creepy AF.
“You’re really soft” to a person you’ve never touched.
20. Why, smurfblue WHY?
“did you do something different with your (hair, makeup, clothes etc) today?”
21. LEGOF has officially mind-fucked everyone.
Do you ever consciously think about breathing?
Now they will start to breathe consciously. Shit, it backfired on me.