One of the most obnoxious trends associated with weddings is the inexplicable pressure for the bride to lose ridiculous amounts of weight so that she can look “good” in the wedding photos. While there are certainly ways to ensure that you look good in photos (lighting, makeup, etc.), trying to lose so much weight that you look like a different person isn’t one of them.
That said, people have no problem preying on the insecurities of brides-to-be.
Cassie Young, one of the hosts of the online radio program, “The Bert Show,” is in the midst of planning her wedding — and she’s apparently already receiving unsolicited fitness advice from “experts.”
A purported personal trainer apparently messaged Cassie, offering to help her lose weight for her big day. When she politely declined his services, however, he attempted to body-shame her into submission, reminding her of the “importance” of her wedding photos.
Cassie decided to share screenshots of the exchange to Facebook, to remind other women that there are people out there who will make every effort to strong-arm your confidence into submission.
Her Facebook caption reads:
This is long, but I feel that it’s really important.
This guy reached out to me on Twitter with a pitch (which I have no problem with), but then it spiraled into something else.
I’m posting this because I want every woman and man to know that it does not MATTER what you look like. (I’m blue. He’s gray.)
You are worthy. Love is out there for you. Life is waiting with open arms. It doesn’t matter if you’re skinny or fat or between the two or willowy or broad shouldered or peer shaped or like a board or anything in between. You get good stuff in life by being YOU. That’s what matters.
If you think of life as a “game” with being skinny as how you “win,” this guy is offering to play by the rules and get you there. I’m telling you the game is BOGUS. You don’t need the game. I reject the game. I REFUSE TO PLAY. It’s a fake construct that you can step outside of.
Your inner-value and self-worth comes from YOU, not what you look like. Who gives a f**k if you got a few extra pounds. Or ten. Or twenty. Thirty. Whatever. If you are happy and healthy, that’s ALL that matters. Those pounds DO 👏NOT 👏DEFINE 👏YOU 👏OR 👏YOUR 👏WORTH. Don’t let people like this try to convince you otherwise, because they’ll try – but it’s because they don’t understand yet. They’re caught up in the game and can’t see it for what it is. You can.
Life is waiting for you. It’s too short to be spent worrying about a belly roll. Go be happy and live it to your fullest.
Too true, girl.
Let this serve as a reminder to every bride out there who’s fretting over not looking like an elegant stick-figure in her wedding dress: your body is good. Be good to it. And stop letting people like this anonymous assh*le tell you how you should feel about it.
After all, as long as unsatisfying heterosexual sex still exists in the world, can you really trust what any random dude says about the female body? Men are still mystified by the location of the clitoris, don’t let them tell you what your body fat should be.