12 Times Urban Dictionary Ruined Wedding Terms

Urban Dictionary is a place where people throw adulthood out the window and define words or slang the way they really wanted to say it, no filter necessary. This crowdsourcing site keeps it anonymous, so you know these brutally vulgar definitions are both fitting and messed up at the same time.

And nothing is held sacred here, even simple wedding descriptions. So we looked them up for you and left the censored definitions aside. Apologies in advance.

1. Bridesmaids

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The act of sitting down and shitting or pissing oneself in a public place such as the middle of a street.

2. Groomsman

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A man who tries to get the groom to come to his senses before he commits to a life long nightmare.

3. Wedding Cake

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Wedding Caking is relatively uncommon, but is popular with the underground porn industry, large orgies, and swinging parties.

4. Honeymoon

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When a married couple spend their wedding night removing their pants and displaying their asses to one another in a ritualistic fashion.

5. Father of the Bride

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A man who has a special set of skills that may or may not include weapons training and who will protect his daughter at all costs if and when groom screws up.

6. Wedding Band

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Similar to the female wedding band, but contrary to popular belief, the male wedding band is actually placed around the males nuts after sex on their wedding night.

7. Wedding Invitations

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Distribution of cheap wedding invitations may result in Funeral Invitations for the “licker” of the envelopes.

8. Diamond Ring

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An offering made to a female to get her to open her legs.

9. Wedding

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The marriage of two ding-a-lings.

10. Maid of Honor

You’re basically the brides bitch. You do what ever she says

11. Best Man

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An acquaintance with whom you trust a five minute speech that could, potentially, ruin the rest of your life.

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