Someone stumbled upon a girlfriend’s list of ‘rules’ for her boyfriend, and I sincerely hope they aren’t together anymore

Jealousy is typically destructive in romantic relationships, and indulging in feelings of possessiveness often ends up pushing the other person away — which is why most people try to avoid acting manic or clingy towards their loved one.

But, then again, some people have just decided to really lean into their deranged side.

Twitter user Kale Keyes recently found a rather intimidating list on a piece of paper in a used car. The list of “rules” seems to have been written by a (rather jealous) girlfriend, demanding some pretty specific behaviors from her boyfriend.

screen shot 2017 08 10 at 11 51 00 am Someone stumbled upon a girlfriends list of rules for her boyfriend, and I sincerely hope they arent together anymore

Here’s a closer look at the list, in case you wanted to fully appreciate the unrealistic nature of most of these demands.

screen shot 2017 08 10 at 11 50 21 am Someone stumbled upon a girlfriends list of rules for her boyfriend, and I sincerely hope they arent together anymore

Um, okay. Something tells me this woman would be considered “high-maintenance.”

After reading this list, I have a few questions:

  • What’s this girl’s beef with Keegan??
  • Will walking away from women in the middle of a conversation adversely affect this guy’s social life?
  • What happens at Honda? Is there sexy stuff going on at the car dealership?
  • How does texting “I love you” prevent one from “messing around”?
  • Why can he NOT SPEAK about Tyler, Noah, Deven or Josh??

I may never get the answers.

Unanswered questions aside, Twitter is already giving this possessive girlfriend the thumbs down.

In my personal, professional opinion (which is actually in no way professional), it seems as though the guy in question may have previously cheated on the girlfriend, and the outlandish list is her way of drawing a line in the sand and outlining the stipulations for the two of them getting back together.

the theory doesn’t make the situation any less unhinged  — but at least it gives me a somewhat comforting explanation as to why a person in a relationship would act like such a diabolical villain.

Also, going forward, I am definitely using “You are NOT allowed to get mad at me about a single thing ever again,” as a general life rule for everyone around me.

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